Thursday, September 30, 2010
I've had Bulletproof playing almost non-stop in the back ground of my mind lately.
Which is a great song to have playing there!
(Although I wish it was the only thing playing on a loop back there.)
I have so much still to do and only two weeks to do it!
The whole family is gearing up for Pat's Big Wedding!
So many! exclamation! points!
More on everything later. Today is going to be one busy-dizzy day.
I'm just glad I got to get a jump on things with some early morning yoga.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
I am off to the gym to scour off this sour day.
In the meantime, one glimmer of happy hope left in my life is this fantastic little book that I seemed to have picked up at just the right time. It's called Make yourself Happy by Lucy Knisley. Lucy is this marvelously inspiring artist working out of Chicago who is funny and sweet and draws the best Spock/Kirk doodles of anyone on the planet.
I wish I had time to go into what's so awesome about her but check her work out for yourselves.
And buy her book(s)!
I swear, totally worth it.
And in the meantime, here is song with song amazing lyrics!
Long Live La Roux!
(I wanted to Embed Bulletproof but I couldn't! Thanks Youtuble!)
Monday, September 27, 2010
1.) People's Republik
2.) Charlie's Beer Garden
3.) Cambridge Commons
4.) Red Bones
What a magnificent, bromantic weekend.
For those of you who may not know (how could you not? But here, I will help you learn) a bromance is defined as "the complicated love and affection shared by two straight males." As a lesbian I have co-opted this term to refer to my own friendships that are more buddy than baby.
(Remember to quote me if you steal that.)
"More buddy than baby."
Whilst perusing urbandictionary.com for that definition I came across this little tidbit on the history and origin of the term:
Provenance/Origin: "Bromance" is a portmanteau of the two words "brother" and "romance". Originally coined by author/editor Dave Carnie in "Big Brother Magazine." Big Brother was a sort of R rated skateboarding/skate culture magazine that was eventually purchased by Larry Flynt's Hustler conglomerate and consequently taken out of circulation due to unsatisfactory sales performance. Carnie used the word on several occasions to describe relationships between skate-buddies who spent a lot of time together and/or shared hotel rooms on every tour/skate road trip.
In any case, my weekend from heaven started off rough. I got locked out of hot yoga on Friday night after traveling for over an hour (!!) to get to the yoga studio and running smack into Mass Ave. road work traffic.
I saved myself from that bummer by wandering over to The Phoenix Landing in Central Square clad in my yoga shorts for a pint of Hoegarden where I sat and sipped and wrote lengthily in my journal.
After class ended Meg and Chloe and Alecia and I pre-gamed, listened to fantastic dance music (Passion Pit anyone?) then left for the club.
I swear JP lesbians get stranger every time I visit. Alas, we danced, we drank, Meghan ordered us all a shot of straight tequila (barf!). And, since I knew the bartender, she hooked us up with what amounted to double shots of tequila (double barf) but the rocks glasses she served them in were RED HOT on account of having come straight out of the dishwasher, so there we are holding up our "shots" of HOT tequila, licking the salt and choking down Jose then squinching our limes only to realize Meghan hadn't even sipped hers yet.
She's just standing there pinky out, with a smile on her face saying, I don't DO shots of tequila, you guys.
So much shouting followed this.
Shouting, and threats and jumping up and down.
And after Meghan coughed down about half of her glass and refused to take anymore we all went out on the dance floor and danced the night away.
(Confession: I spent the better part of my night on a vinyl couch listening to the Remarkable Life Story of one of my fellow SMO's. Growing up is hard to do.)
Chloe drove us home. Bromance and I passed out in the back seat. We were forced to cuddle on account of a) being ready to pass out and b) because there was a TV set taking up the other half of Chloe's backseat. The following morning Chloe would ask me and Alecia both "Who was the one who stuck chewing gum to the front of my TV screen?"
(Hint: It wasn't me!)
She squished it onto the screen, too. It came off easily the next day but that fact makes it no less hilarious.
Saturday was Pub Roll day.
I slept late and went to brunch with Alecia at Ball Square Cafe which is amazing! And if you ever find yourself in the Winter Hill area of Sommerville you simply MUST check it out. It's that good. I had the asparagus and prosciutto omelet with cheddar, grilled mashed potatoes and dry cinnamon raisin toast (divine) with an iced coffee. Alecia had an egg whites omelet with avocado and some other veggies (I forget), the diced home fries and a pumpkin spice roast coffee. Also, raisin toast. Everything about this meal was superb.
The customer service is awesome (the owner greets you outside, every time!) the food was amazing and the company was terrific (best buddies for lyfe!). We even went back the next day for seconds (with Mirta and Meggo in tow).
The Pub Roll itself was more fun than I ever imagined! The whole thing was just dipped in awesome sauce!
We started at People's Republik in Central Square, moved to Charlie's Beer Garden (an outdoor pub!) squeezed between claustrophobic brick buildings in Harvard Square, then pedaled over to Cambridge Commons for some delicious micro-brews (the first pumpkin beer listed on their rotating taps list is To! Die! For!) and we rounded out the night at the not-quite-as-packed-as-I-expected-it-to-be Red Bones in Davis Square.
Early in the day Alecia and I stopped for burritos (!!!!) and got a long Kryptolok chain, since a lot of us don't have bike locks (I live in the suburbs! c'mon). Then we went over to People's Republik early to throw some darts and get ready for the team to arrive.
Once everyone got there and had a beer we were all ready to roll! Only Meghan and Chloe (inexplicably) weren't there yet. I checked my last text from them and it came in 42 minutes ago! They were only in Porter Square! They could walk to People's Republik faster than that - where were they?
Meghan comes rolling up on her long board without a bicycle in sight. WTF?!
Long story short, they were late beacuse a few weeks back Meghan drove into a parking garage with her bike locked into her to bike rack and now (shocker!) the bike rack appears to be broken. After watching her bike wobble dangerously from side to side, and then trying to stuff the bike into her tiny Volkswagen then trying to stuff her bike into Chloe's little coupe (which was already housing Chloe's bike) they gave up, got Meg's long board and skated over.
Through good ole' American ingenuity, they rigged up a handle (it looked like a tail!) that fit through the loops of Chloe's pants to pull Meg from bar to bar. It worked perfectly! And towards the end of the night (in true Hegman fashion) Meg discovered that if she pulled HARD on the handle not only would she race ahead fast but Chloe would be pulled almost to a complete stop. This fact entertained her to no end. (Poor Chloe!)
In slightly grosser fashion, one of our bikers took a terrible fall earlier in the day and sported major road rash on her arm and leg.
As her roommate told us the harrowing (yet inappropriately hilarious) tale of how Lex tried to make a turn one needs lots of momentum for, but somehow (inexplicably) had none, and washed out down the scrabbly stones off a drop of more than 6 feet and her arm got twisted up behind her head and the bike crashed down on top of her, we all winced and ooh!-ed and ahh!-ed.
MM rubbed her own shoulder in sympathy and Hegman, well, you can see for yourself what it looks like when Hegman empathizes...
At some bar along the way, one of us (me) snatched an Oktoberfest boobie advertisement (see below) and stealthily brought it along to the next pub. I had been running through possible team names for our new bike gang and settled upon TEAM BOOBIE SNATCHERS!
Not only does it work perfectly for all the gays but also for the straight men we had riding along with us. It's quite the diverse group, you know!
We ended the night at Red Bones. Zee met us there and we all had a round of shots (thanks Lex, MM and B'mance!), met new friends and told jokes to old ones. Two of the folks on our pub roll had tricked out Razor scooters they used to tag along! ("Tricked out" here means they covered them in cool multi-colored stickers).
The pictures are all blurry beacuse the camera was as buzzed as we were! That or none of us know how to use a real, manual focus contraption. Here I am trying to convince Zee her "Z" silly band is really an "N" and she obviously got it for me, since my name is "taNa," so hand it over.
The kids that had the scooters also brought a chrome bell that had a rubber flower on the end. I found that there are MANY a hilarious position in which I could hold that bell that were both dirty, sexual explicit and INCREDIBLY annoying.
By "annoying" I really mean awesome.
So that was Pub-Roll version one. We have planned another one for Hallowe'en weekend (Which might mean I'll be wearing a superhero cape!). This time it's a house roll and we'll be going from one friends house to the next, from Medford to Teal Square to Winter Hill to Cambridge and this time we are making T-shirts!
My suggestion is:
"The Boobie Snatchers Ride Again!"
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Click my face over there in the Nav bar (---->) to view all of the APE drawings I've made for the Alternative Press Expo this year in San Fran (It'll redirect you to my DeviantArt page).
Remember to leave a nice comment!
*All that APE work will be for sale at the conference. Swing on by and pick some up for yourself.
More accurately, the character Mariska plays from Law and Order: SVU named Detective Olivia Benson.
Mm... yummy Olivia Benson....
Now, I love Miss Olivia Benson.
Of course I do. I suffer through the brutality and rapes that are the cornerstone of SVU simply to watch her swagger around, badge on hip, looking tough and taking names. But, as I told Katie, I could never dress up as Detective Olivia Benson beacuse let's face it, I would find a mirror and try and make out with my reflection all night long!
Unproductive and antisocial.
Meg is going as a scuba diver. She's adamant about it. Even though Meg would make a superb Alex Cabot, assistant to the DA in the Law and Order Universe.
Speaking of characters we could all dress up as, once Katie gets a tan she could be the forensics lady:
But Halloween is serious business.
Last year, as we all know, I went as Mister Lucius Malfoy from the Harry Potter universe. I also dressed up as Fred one time (who we all know is one of the Weasley twins) alongside my cousin Corinne who went as George (You could hardly tell us apart) (<----sarcasm).
So what to be this year?
I think I would make an excellent Tom Riddle.
They even have a sale on green v-neck sweaters and Slytherin style striped scarves at Kohl's right now! But those who prefer goodness and love say I should dress up as that messy-haired Harry Potter. My question, folks is who is going to dress up as Emma Watson -er- I mean as Hermione?
Or perhaps to match Meghan I will dress up as an octopus or a deep sea fish, possibly that one with the lantern on his head from Nemo. How to make that look work though....
So many choices.
Patrick's wedding is FAST approaching and I still have to find myself an outfit. Also I am going to need to get a real haircut one of these days since I am rocking some uneven curls in the back.
My mom is all a twitter getting ready for all of her sisters and brothers to be in one place again. This is family reunion time for us.
And of course, since today is the first day of Autumn down came the summer curtains and off came the pastel fish table cloth. Up went the thick winter window drapes and the pumpkin colored, leaf patterned table cloth.
My mom is awesome.
I would be remiss if I did not mention how the Republicans blocked a repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell yesterday. They actually blocked the approval of the entire defense budget yesterday.
Yep. They blocked all of the funding for all of our National defense. And, in the meantime we are still throwing out honorable, able-bodied soldiers in a time of war. Of two wars, actually.
So, the next time I'm standing in the kitchen, listening to you all tell me how Obama and the democrats are weak on the policies that make us safer and stronger as a nation, I'm just going to hold up a mirror.
But enough of that.
Let's all rally behind the real news face of America.
(This pinata analogy is rad)
|The Daily Show With Jon Stewart||Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c|
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
This is nerve-wracking for many reasons, not the least of which is that I am going to sell Duck! my book and a bunch of artwork that (for reasons I, myself cannot understand) scares the shit out of me.
Time to put on your big girl pants, Tana.
I'm also making some APE-inspired artwork to hock at the show. This amuses me so completely it's almost embarrassing. Seriously, I'm giggling at my desk.
Duck! by editing some of the weaker moments of dialog. I made a new back cover, too. I should be getting my proto-copy in today or tomorrow and if everything looks nice I'll be ordering up a whole bunch of them.
This all very, very exciting.
I don't think you can see it in the corner of this picture, but my bouncy ball, the one I always sit on at work, has deflated. It has not been a good month for me and rulers. I snapped my small plastic one in half somehow and I must have missed a shard when I was cleaning up the pieces because yesterday that shard found it's way (point first) into my bouncy ball.
Now I have to sit in a regular office chair and I HATE that.
Somebody call the WAhmbulance.
In other news, Flag Football started up again.
Literally, everyone I know plays or spectates. It's just what you do when you are gay and live in Boston. You want to hang out with the queers? You go to flag football. Or at the very least the social afterward.
This week was alright. Some teams won, some lost. We had deliciously cold pumpkin beers and Bailey (who was exhausted from the 2 hour hike I took him on that morning in the Fells) raced and ran around the fields post-clean up ignoring his ex-housemate (Sorry, Hickey) and smiling from ear to ear.
I don't know if you can make out the image on Zana's tee-shirt in that picture up there, but I find it deeply disturbing and I'm not sure why. It looks like some guy just standing there but with a monster face. Or a mascots' face. Or some face that is both hairy and unidentifiable. For whatever reason that shirt just really bothers me (and she ALWAYS wears it around me!).
We did shots and talked. I saw Erika and spoke with her and that was nice. As nice as it could be, I suppose, given the circumstances. Break ups are always hard. I told her about the babies and she told me about her sister going into labor. Family stuff as always been easy for us. In a way it was refreshing.
That's about it.
The flies left over from the Marshfield Fair (which ended almost a month ago!) are still here and still driving! me! mad! I must kill about 20 flies a day and 20 more come to the funeral. Maybe the one upside to the cold weather rolling in will be that the flies will freeze (insert maniacal laughter here).
But now it's lunchtime.
And tonight I will be taking Katie C. and Beth's tickets to the Red Sox game, since they can't go, and watching the Sox struggle to beat the Orioles. Come on boys!
At least there will be Oktoberfest on tap.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
PROCEED WITH CAUTION!
Yesterday I was cutting out some Matt's Auto Service coupons when I zipped a Xacto knife straight into my finger tip, alongside the cuticle and stopped only when I ran aground on my own knuckle.
I'd like to say this was a new experience, but...
I did this once before, but not as badly, about a million years ago.
I was working as an intern for a design studio after school, cutting some papers, half paying attention and SLICE! I shaved the tip of my thumb clean off. Same ruler-holding hand and everything. My left thumb still has a tiny crescent moon scar and everything.
Thankfully Matt heard me yelp! and he ran all the way in from the back of the shop. He's great under pressure. He got the first aid kit and helped me clumsily bandage my finger up. I am pleased to report I didn't pass out and (more importantly) I cut my left hand, which here means "Not my drawing hand."
Turns out my mom is a bit squeamish. I was shocked! I always thought mom's were impervious to the pains and bludgeoning accidents their children get into (Even if their children happen to be 29 year old adults). She did get the clumsy stuck-together blood soaked bandage off my finger bravely and re-wrapped it (properly this time), and so what if she had to do it with an ice-cold Coors Lite standing by? What's it to you?
Aside from finger slicing accidents there is some good news.
I heard from the APE conference out in San Fransisco that some tables opened up and I can rent one if I still want to. Which I do (even though I am a chicken) and I faxed over all the paper work and what-nots and now I am just waiting to hear back from them.
This means I have to actually stop being a perpetual weenie and sell! my! book!
Or try to.
Today is the deadline on table registration, though, and I haven't heard back from the con-people yet. It's still early in SF though, so I'll give it some more time before I Take! Drastic! Action(s)!
And in the meantime I've got lots of art to start making and even, possibly a banner? for the table I may or may not have?
Keep your (undamaged) fingers crossed for me.
As a side note, one of the cool things about this conference is that they do a queer comics panel every year. Yay gays! I am excited for that.
I apologize for any spelling mistakes or typos in today's post but as you can see: I am typing with one of my two hunt-and-peck fingers straight up in the air.
Well done, Tan.
Monday, September 13, 2010
"Those little piggies have wings, Nina!"
She was looking through her blue and yellow toy binoculars ("UN-oculrs" in kidspeak) at the imaginary birds out at the bird feeder. It took Nina (or "Neen" for short. It's what they call my mom instead or gram, or gramma, or nana or grandmother) a minute to explain to me that they call the birds "little piggies with wings" on account of how much birdseed the birds eat. We must go through a 5lb bag a week! But we get all sorts of little fliers out there. Blue jays and cardinals and goldfinches and red-breasted robins to name a few.
Mom's been taking blurry pictures of all of them to sort of document the wildlife (such that it is) outside our house. We even got a baby hawk once! We think it was a redtail but we aren't sure.
By the time I grabbed the camera and made this little video Sekiah had stopped calling them little piggies with wings and instead told us all about the beautiful birds' nest (it exists only in her imagination) and the blue jay (he wasn't actually there, either, as Ethan will later point out)
God, I love these kids.
(Also, I believe those "Unoculars" are upside down)
Anyway, it's another Monday of another busy week, only this time it's CHILLY outside. Boo and double boo.
I did pilfer a sweet zip-hoodie vest from Zee this weekend in exchange for some outfit advice. I think I made out in the deal since, at the time, I was wearing navy blue plaid shorts, a brown belt and (with the addition of my new sweet hoodie) a black vest. That's right folks! It takes a certain special someone to pull off the black-brown-blue ensemble.
We went dancing at La Machine Saturday night.
Unbeknown to us it was Dress Like a School Girl night, which here means every back to college 20-something girl looked like they had stepped fresh out of that Britney Spears video, plaid skirts and tube socks and neckties galore. Katie C. joked with me that if she had known that, her and Beth would've dressed up like nuns, frocks and wooden rosary beads and rulers galore.
Now THAT would've been funny.
I danced the night away with my bromance and all of our gorgeous lady friends. I have resolved to work on my twirling, too, since I am not a girl who twirls, or gets twirled strictly speaking. But I do have one friend who is into that and whose sweet dance moves require that I up my game.
My Greece books came in over the weekend! This means that among other things I will researching where to go and what to see in the 8 days I will be roaming the islands and the country side.
First up on the list is Meteora!
It's an area that is more or less in central Greece with 6 monasteries built into the side of these huge rocky monoliths that reach up towards the heavens. Meteora literally means "suspended rocks", "suspended in the air" or "in the heavens above." It is also where we get the word Meteor (I can't help but think of the Greek dad in the movie "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" rattling off all the English words derived from Greek roots. I suspect this will become a trip theme.)
Since I will only be traveling for about 8 days (10 total but I am not counting the whole day it will take to get there and get back) I want to pay as much attention to the logistics as I can right now. Planning is important! I am looking into renting a bike and pedaling around whatever island(s) I land on (Lesvos, anyone?) and possibly renting a car or (preferably) riding a train to the inland spots like Meteora. If you have any tips, send 'em my way!
And I feel it important to note that my brother gets married in less than a month! My mom has a count down currently on view on our front door designed by the babies in those chalk ink markers that we have left over from the Cape Relay race.
Speaking of the Cape Relay, new pictures surfaced from the trip!
Here is a night-time example of the Chalk-Ink markers fine work:
And I will give you $100 if you can stare at this picture and not go cross-eyed or have a seizure. (Not really, but LOOK at that outfit! It was 4 o'clock in the morning Lauren, cut us some slack!)
Our early registration for next year's Cape Relay has already been sent in and it looks like we are going to have 100% of our team returning. This is tremendously exciting news, my friends.
On that high note I am going to leave this rambling less-than-coordinated blog post and go do some legitimate work today.
Be good my peeples.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
First, there was Red Molly concert at Club Passim last Wednesday with Meghan and her aunt and uncle that was awesome. I liked the opener Jud Caswell more than the headliner (whose twangy songs were all pretty mellow and funeral-dirgey: so! much! death! imagery!). Jud had a great voice and a skillful strumming hand (you heard it here first folks!) and was very charming on-stage.
The follow night (Happy Birthday AP!) was Amanda Fucking Palmer's Cabaret! If you haven't got tickets yet, too bad sucka's it's all sold out!
Matt and I dressed up as Marines from 1933ish and wandered around Harvard Square searching for the front door of the venue for far too long. I was hungry and forced to do everything on low blood sugar. Of Matthew's many wonderful traits, knowing how to help on Tana's Great Adventures isn't one of them. It's up to me to drive in, park, find a restaurant we both like, know where we are going at all times, remember the tickets - all that jazz.
And complicating matters was the weather. Being one million degrees out we had to take his huge truck into Harvard Square on account of the fact that he had AC and we both had to wear long pants (It's summer! Come on!).
So there I am, at the helm of this massive Dodge Ram Truck parallel parking into the spot we finally found after doing the Harvard Square Loop-de-Loop. We slam the doors and take off in exactly the wrong direction (of course). We duck into a Air Conditioned bar for a quick pint (It's what any girl dressed up like a solider in pants that are too big for her would do) where we study the map and find the right way to go, then skip dinner and head in.
The show itself is FANTASTIC. The No Photo/No Video rule is strictly enforced and the glittered up dancers in sequined pasties and goth-inspired lace nothings are exquisite. The whole show starts with a Never Have I Ever sing along drinking song ("I've come home," thinks Tana). Matt and I order a couple of Corona's and tuck in.
The whole place is set up like the fictional, seedy, German Kit Kat club. We are on a side platform full of 4-top tables along the left side of the room. We have a waitress dressed in black and the dancers from the show climb up and over the railing regularly. Mostly it's the athletic gay boys with their white hairless chests and speedos, coming up and over feet first in fishnet stockings and sparkly, Wizard-of-Oz style heels.
Happy friends; fantastic dinner
I didn't know the play before going, so the shocking moments really shocked me and the funny moments had me laughing out loud. It was wonderful being so close to so many strangers. Cabaret is definitely a show for the freaks and the young and the wackos (my peeples!).
Although the young part may not apply so much anymore...
Which brings me (via the perfect segway) into my decision for the 30th birthday party location!
I had one of those moments where I slapped my forehead and thought, Why didn't I think of this before?
I asked a pilot named Scottie (a buddy I met in Egypt for Marae's 30th birthday) where he thought I should go and as soon as he suggested Greece, I knew I was sold. I spent a few moments today order guide books and examining maps but I know this is the right choice for me. I'll dust off my Euro's, book a red-eye and an 8 day stay and hike my way around some islands. From what little I know already it is going to be cool and most likely rainy, but what better place to stand in the rain, than Greece.
More to come on that.
In other news I am going to the Bay Rays game tonight with an old college roommie. I told her the story of Meghan calling them the Tampa, Bay Rays instead of the Tampa Bay, Rays (Nevermind if you don't get it) so I am sort of psyched this is the game I am going to. Also, how rad is it that someone is actually taking ME to a game instead of the other way around (Well, Katie C. did that once this year and that was awesome)!
So much going on lately.
And how could I forget the bachelorette party this weekend? A 15 passenger van full of straight girls out to get their drink-and-dance on at Foxwoods. I thought the whole ride down that we were actually going to Mohegan Sun (although lets face it - a casino is a casino). It was girls-gone-wild at the MGM grand and boy can those ladies party. I also learned valuable lessons about how boys dance (they don't, they grind) how boys flirt (one sent over a round of waters in shot glasses) (really, guy?) and my sweet dance moves got compared to Ellen Degeneres (I did not take this as a compliment!). I ran more laps around those ladies than a sheep dog just trying to create some space to breathe in. Men tend to be taller than the ladies and the leering was a perpetual problem!
The night started off so sweet
By the end of the night there were offers to go up to a hotel room for sex and cocaine, many a stolen Grey Goose mixed drink, two guys in identical shirts (why didn't one of you change?) adderol hangovers, double vision and also Kevin Dillon who plays Johnny Drama and whoever plays Turtle on HBO's Entourage were at the club we danced at. At one point Patrick's future bride, the woman for whom who whole party celebrated bumped shoulders with Kevin and hollered back "Watch yourself Drama!"
Oh, the stories the next day.
And so that, my dear friends, was the start of my September.
Here's to many more great days like these.
I know, let's start off with a Red Sox game.
Tonight in fact.
And tomorrow we'll plan to go to Greece.